Scatter-brained fool…

Here I am again, once more, and I have no idea why.

They were more peaceful times. Perhaps only in hindsight, and not actually.

No. Back in the days of imps and eggs – still I am troubled by eggs – things were simpler, though my wants more complicated. My wants are now simpler, but things more complicated. Net complexity is down though, so this must be a good thing.

Fragmentation breeds complexity. Desire breeds complexity.

Simplification is not just for things. In fact, the simplification of things is probably where I have been going wrong. My desire to simplify the external has resulted in cyclical successes and failures: I simplify, then complicate, then simplify, then complicate.

Simple mindset. To effect any lasting change, attention needs to be shifted away from things and onto the mind.

It seems so serene, but it could crack at any point – my mind, that is.

All so damned simple in the mind, but easier said than done, easier thought than said. Turning thoughts to action takes energy and effort. This is where the challenge lies.

Understanding biological and subconscious impulse is important: remove the decision-making process where possible and leave the desired option as the only one; don’t waste precious will power.

Don’t run before you can walk; you will only get so far before you fall.

The mind desires chaos, it has been conditioned for it. To quote Dave Mustaine, the mind, in its own way, is “addicted to chaos.” Serenity makes it uncomfortable. Serenity threatens modern society. Serenity undermines everything most people work for. I think this is why serenity is most commonly achieved in monastic settings, away from the people who find it uncomfortable. When most of society is distracted and chaotic, serenity is outcast, and anti-social. When one realises that nothing really matters, then very little is of consequence: people suffer and die, things change. In the end, everything is temporary. And once you are dead, nothing will matter to you.

I do not believe in heaven. I wish I did because the alternative is bleak. And wrestling with that every day is tough on the brain.

I forgot what the point was.

Oh wait… there is no point.







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